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A look at the potential Olympic events we may be witness to in the near future. Words by Karen Carmichael and Brielle Martell . Illustration by Acute Graphics
Every Olympics, a new sport is introduced, adding to the roster of champions. In 1984, synchronised swimming was the newcomer, and beach volleyball in 1992. This August, in Beijing, BMX will debut as an Olympic sport. So what's to stop other sporting activities from reaching Olympic status? Perhaps in 12 years' time, the Olympics will look something like this. or perhaps not.
1. CREASE LIGHTNING
Are you a thrill-seeker with an unassailable sense of domestic pride? Extreme Ironing may be the meticulous adrenaline rush you've been looking for. Participants do something sensible and everyday such as jump off a cliff or climb a sheer rockface while actually ironing their shirts. No, we're not making this up! Extreme indeed. www..em>extremeironing.com
2. .WITHOUT A PADDLE
Rather than lounge around in mud and call it "spa treatment", Bog Snorkellers take to the mud like a duck to water. with a snorkel. Racers must doggy-paddle through 110m of muddy water cut into the Waen Rhydd peat bog outside Llanwrtyd Wells, Wales. www.green-events.co.uk
3. WITH A PADDLE
Cool off with a refreshing game of Canoe Polo. A kayak replaces the polo pony as the player's trusty steed, turning this into a major contact sport and allowing for many near shipwrecks. Forget the fancy dress, grassy fields and mallets; players move the ball along with hands, paddles and waves. www.canoepolo.org.uk
4. FOOTSIE FOR PSYCHOS
If you've mastered thumb wrestling, try your hand at Toe Wrestling. Played in the UK since the 1970s, and rejected for the games in 1997, combatants battle using only their toes.
Watch out for cheating methods, such as sharp toenails, foot tickling or distracting nail polish.
5. FLOAT LIKE A BUTTERFLY
For those who require more intellectual stimulation in their fistfights, check out Chess Boxing. Two opponents alternate between four-minute rounds of chess and three-minute rounds of boxing, with a minute's break in between. Competitors' physical and mental limits are tested in this combination of mind and muscle. www..em>wcbo.org
6. YOU LOOKIN' AT ME?
Keep your eyes peeled for this little-known sport: Competitive Staring. Become a member of the National Association of Staredown Professionals (NASP) and compete in a variety of staring competitions that are so exciting, you won't even blink. www.prostaredown.com
7. MOW DOWN THE OPPOSITION
Who says lawn mowing has to be a chore? In Britain, they spice it up by organising Lawn Mower Races. These serious motorheads rev their rotary engines and empty their rear grass catchers at speeds of 160kmh to get to the finish line, leaving opponents' shattered dreams of victory in their beautifully trimmed wake. www..em>blmra.co.uk
8. THE TOUGHEST MARITAL ART
For a cavalier way to express your love to your wife, why not sweep her off of her feet with Wife Carrying? Originating in Sonkajärvi, Finland, husbands test their physical as well as marital endurance by completing an obstacle course while carrying their wives in a variety of creative ways. www.sonkajarvi.fi
9. THE GRASS IS ALWAYS GREENER
Driving in the city is a nightmare, not only for motorists, but for a more dignified breed of urban vandal. In Urban Golf you drive out of your driveway, chip out of the chippy and end up in the pub. Hazards include cars, windows and the elderly. Using a small leather sack filled with goose feathers for a ball averts mayhem. www..sgcgolf.com
10. WHEEL OF MISFORTUNE
As if hitting a ball with a crooked stick weren't hard enough, players looking for more of a challenge attempt a full-length hockey game while balancing on a single wheel. Unicycle Hockey combines ice hockey sticks, street hockey balls and 10 players wheeling madly about an enclosed court. www.unicon14.dk
Przy okazji każdej olimpiady przybywa jakaś nowa dyscyplina. Niektórym trudno jednak będzie - przynajmniej na razie - uzyskać status dyscypliny olimpijskiej.
1. Extremalne prasowanie - zawodnicy skaczą z klifu albo wspinają się na stromą górę, prasując w tym czasie swoją koszulę.
2. Nurkowanie w bagnie - uczestnicy wyścigu nurkują z fajką w błotnistej wodzie i pieskiem pokonują dystans 110 m.
3. Kajak polo - gracze zamiast na rumakach siedzą w kajakach, zamiast młotka używają wiosła, trawę zastępują wodne fale.
4. Siłowanie się na nogę -trzeba uważać na oszukańcze metody, na przykład ostre panokcie albo łaskotanie.
5. Szachowy boks - zawodnicy rozgrywają na przemian pojedynki szachowe i bokserskie, muszą popisać się tak siłą intelektu, jak siłą mięśni.
6. Patrzenie sobie w oczy - choć to mało znana dyscyplina, zawody są bardzo ekscytujące.
7. Bieg przez przeszkody z żoną na rękach - dla tych, którzy szukają oryginalnego sposobu na wyrażenie miłości.
8. Wyścigi kosiarek do trawy - najlepsi zawodnicy potrafią rozwinąć prędkość nawet 160 km/h.
9. Miejski golf - runda rozgrywanego na ulicach golfa przeważnie kończy się w pubie. Główne przeszkody w grze to samochody, okna i staruszkowie.
10. Hokej na monocyklach - do gry potrzebne są kije do hokeja, piłeczki, dziesięciu graczy na monocyklach i boisko.
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